Thursday, March 22, 2012

INTO THE PAST WITH PAIN...264

INTO THE PAST WITH PAIN…264

Dr K Prabhakar Rao


(Gandhi, Nehru and Patel are sitting in Gandhi’s room in heavens and conversing. The room is poorly furnished with four simple chairs and a stool. A black and white TV is kept at a corner It is afternoon and all appear to be cordial.)

Gandhi. Patel, I am feeling thirsty, get me some clean water.

Patel. Fine Bapu. I am always at your service. Did I give you dirty water at any point of time?

Nehru. Hee..heee..heee

Patel. Jawaharlal, what worries you now? Why that hee..heee..hee?

Nehru. How slavish you are ?

Patel. You are no less brother. You were a bigger slave to Bapu.

Gandhi. I did not mean that you gave me unclean water earlier.

( Patel gets up and fetches water to Gandhi in a glass after thoroughly washing. Bapu drinks water and coughs vigorously. Gandhi thumps his own head and gets composed.

Gandhi. Why people get hiccups while drinking water at times?

Patel. Bapu. I heard from people that such things happen when some one is abusing him.

Nehru. This is all shit. You are talking nonsense.

Patel. It is very true.

Nehru. Who will abuse or curse Bapu?

Patel. Why not? There are plenty of guys who do that. Many curse him if do not use abusive words.

Nehru. Why they should do that?

Patel. Brother. You know everything very well. Yet, you pretend as if you are ignorant. section of Indians are much critical about him for his role in freedom movement. They blame his policies for partition and todays problems in the country. They criticize him for Muslim appeasement.The present problems in the country due to Pakistan are attributed to you.

Gandhi. Critics always will be there. You can not satisfy all. We did best at that time.

Patel. Hope so.

Gandhi. You are not committal.

Patel. We are all party to it. Look at the suffering India is going through. Look at the governing. Look at the quality of leaders. Look at the dynastic rulers and successions. How shameful? In UP also, dynastic succession resulted. Mulayam Singh’ son has been elevated as CM. What experience he will have to handle senior guys. Elevation of youngsters could result in their later down fall. Any how, it is up to them. Why talk about a cake before eating it.

Gandhi. It is up to leaders. It is their headache. If they want to get screwed up it is up to them. They will learn hard way.

Patel. The elected leaders can not open mouth against Mulayam singh. That is the way in congress and most of the other parties too. It is only BJP that is having some type of policy away from dynastic succession. They do not have dynasties. Every guy is different.

Gandhi. That is because there are many leaders of good claibre and of some potential unlike Congress and SP party. In Congress all dance around Jawahar’s family. That is their best past time. They can not do anything more than that as they do not know anything more than that. Hee..hee..heee.. Any how, why spoil our heads with those guys? Our heads already are mucked up. Let them ruin themselves.

Patel. If they ruin themselves, who is bothered? They are ruining the country.

Gandhi. Very true. What we can do now?

Nehru. Let us watch TV for a change today.

Gandhi. True, Patel. Please switch it on.

( Patel switches on the TV and operates the remote and a news channel appears. The TV announcer appears in suit perspiring.)

TV announcer. This is Time pass Mishra from DoorDarshan. Hee..hee.Hgh..Hgh.. Good afternoon watchers, I am sorry.. Hello viewers of this channel. We now take you to parliament to listen to PM who is making a grand speech.

( The TV makes squeeking sound ..kee…keee…kee and the picture shakes violently and images appear very thin for a short time.)

Gandhi. This is good. I have not heard him till date.

Patel. It will be very interesting indeed. But you have not seen him yet. What is good? The PM or the TV tamasha.

Gandhi. What will be that?

Patel. You shall see it soon.

( After few seconds, PM Dr Man mohan singh appears on the screen. He is well dressed with light blue turban and dark achkan. He has spectacles.)

Dr Singh. Eee..eee..eee.. Good morning gentlemen. Ee..ee…eee…eee.. Today, I speak to you on some issues that are causing great worries to me. Eee..ee..The country is passing through a difficult times. Ee…eee…eee. I am facing many difficulties in running this show. Ee..eee..Hope all of you would rise to the occasion…eee..eee..eeee…eeee.

Gandhi. Patel. What is he speaking? Should we rise up and stand now?I can not hear a single word and can not make out any thing from his voice.He is eating away half the words.

Patel. Keep listening Bapu.That is his style. He is agreat economist. In words too he economises.

Dr Singh. Listen brothers,. I am having great difficult things from the friendly parties in this coalition govt . It is causing great head aches. My head has become heavy.

Patel. Hope his turban is not tight.

Gandhi. He has been used to turban since decades. His party guys are really causing great head ache to him. Every now and then, some party black mails him. First was Raja’s case in Telecom scam. Then Tamil Nadu CM Karunanidhi’s daughter was a problem. She was behind bars. Now this Mamta head ache.

Patel. In head aches, there are varieties. One is migraine. Others are Tension type head ache, Cluster head ache, Harmone head ache, Rebound head ache, Organic head ache and Sinus head ache. To this list, we add coalition head ache. Heee..he…hee

Gandhi. Great Patel. Hooo..hooo..hooo. You are witty.

Patel. In the discussion, we forgot about Dr Singh. Let us listen to him.

Dr Singh. My dear citizens of India. Please listen. I am doing my best to reduce poverty in India. Mr Montek singh has been requested to define the latest poverty index. He has come with a novel formula. Any guy who spends more than Rs 28.5 day is not poor. Finally we found a solution.

Patel. What is he talking Bapu? A quarter bottle of old monk rum costs much more than that. I know that most of the guys drink more than that daily. Does it say that they are not poor. I do not know which economist worked out the details.

Gandhi. I feel sorry for the PM. He has strange and weird guys with him in key places. Any how, let us listen.

Dr Singh. Eee..ee…eeee.. Now we have changed the railway minister due to coalition head aches. Now a now person has taken over. Even this person refused to listen to my order earlier while he was holding the same ministry for a while.He refused to go to accident site. God only can save me..eee..eee …..eee .. Dear citizens. Please bear with me for some more time. It is only a question of time before we fall.. Jai hind..

Gandhi. What a sad situation!

Patel. Bapu, Should we laugh or cry after listening to him.

Gandhi. Why cry? Let us laugh to glory. Good Tamasha. It was very difficult to understand him. I do not know how he addressed UN sessions.

Patel. I feel pity for the listeners. Most of them slept and woke up when all clapped.

Gandhi. It happens. Public speaking is not every ones trait. Many well educated people are failures.

Patel. True.

( The TV suddenly shows a blank screen without any sound)

Gandhi. We are saved from the agony.

Patel. True Bapu. We are saved. Let us relax

( The trio lean back in their chairs and relax)

CURTAIN FALLS

No comments: