Thursday, January 15, 2009

INTO THE PAST WITH PAIN....XVII

INTO THE PAST WITH PAIN XVII

SCENE XVII

Prof Dr Colonel K Prabhakar Rao ( Retired)

(Some people are looking at the statue of Gandhi on the street center in Secunderabad in AP state of India. The Road is called James Street. The statue is dilapidated and painted black. The face has streak of crow droppings. At the base of the statue, few guys are found sleeping fully drunk. some are found gambling. A lady is found soliciting customers. In the mean time suddenly Gandhi’s statue comes to life)

Gandhi.( Waving ) Oh.. Hey.. Oh..Hey guys! Please bring me down. I can not jump from this height

( The on- lookers help Gandhi to get down)

Gandhi. Thanks Bhai. I have worn out knees and can not jump from the pedestal

( The people are thrilled to see Gandhi alive among them and surround him)

Raju ( Onlooker) Bapuji. I am happy you are back. Look Bapu. We are struggling at the hands of present leaders and rulers.

Gandhi. Please do not call them leaders. They are pack of opportunists. They are like wolves to devour you once you elect them.(Gandhi does a jig singing)

I am Gandhi now see I am back
And I have come with an empty sack
I shall catch all such guys now
But till now I do not know how

The present guys feel I was a fool
Yet I am always very cool
I shall twist the tails of all these nuts
And drive them to live in their huts

I gave them freedom to rule the land well
I know they made this nation a big hell
Guys have swindled the nation in many scams
And I feel sorry that Madras has removed its trams

Do not worry now I have come to sort them out
All these guys have eaten well and become very stout
Cash is being found in tons in their bathrooms
Be sure I shall make them sweep the floors with brooms

( Others also do jig and break dance singing and they shout Gandhiji ki jai..)

Raju. Bapu since three days there is no petrol or diesel available in the bunks. Transporters and oil companies are on strike. Guys are openly selling Petrol in black right in front of assembly hall and police headquarters.

Gandhi. Why this situation? What is the government doing?

Raju. Bapu. There is no government in the country.

Bapu. I was told that coalition rulers are there at center

Narsimha( Another onlooker). Bapu! If the government is there in the country, how the Paki thugs can strike at Bombay? Biggest joke is that the government has swallowed the thing and smiling. Some nuts give statement after statement that they kept options open and I feel like breaking my TV set when hear them. A bunch of wasteful guys.

Gandhi. Pakistan appears have taken India for a camel ride and have fooled them. What is the new guy doing now who replaced Patil

Raju. Less is said better it is. Every day they repeat that options were open. Then another guy says we shall see them next time. Suddenly a guy gets a brain wave and gives a statement that Pakistan should not underestimate India and they could go any length

Narsimha. Then Pakistan gives a statement that they will not hesitate to use Atom bomb to save the nation and India develops cold feet. Home minister then states that India will not go for war and would try all other options. Great joke indeed

Gandhi. (Laughs loudly ) What type of nuts are these?

Raju.. Bapu, Let us go and see what is happening in the city

( All of them start walking towards Tank Bund. On the tank bund Gandhi sees many statues lined up and all statues stare in to the distant dirty waters of lake. At some places police constables suspiciously watch them and they are seen talking on wireless sets.)

Gandhi. What are these statues? Why they are all lined up as if facing a firing squad?

Raju..Heee….heeee…heee

Narsimha. Bapu. These are all great Telugu stalwarts from past. Some were kings, queens, Nawabs, poets, social reformers, singers and dancers, actors from dramas,

Gandhi. Thank god, there are no politician among them. They have no time to stand in leisure. They are always busy making money and move around all the time.

Raju. Of course. They may be planning on another place around the lake. There is a necklace road on the other side of lake

Gandhi. In future all dubious politicians of past and present generation could find place there. There is also a road called ministers road adjacent to the lake. The road is the filthiest of all the city roads. Most befitting name.

Raju..Hee..hee..haaa..huu..huu.. True bapu. I wish I do not live to see it

Gandhi. Are they so bad?

Narsimha. None was good. They were all manipulators and selfish guys. There may be one odd guy good among them

Gandhi. Like a swan among crows.

Narsimha. Crow is a good bird. They were like vultures and still shittiest than the vultures..

( Gandhi and his followers cross tank bund and get close to secretariat. They are stopped by a strong team of police men. They are armed with Light machine guns, grenade launchers and some rocket launchers are also seen. A jeep with RCL gun 106 mm manned by army men is also seen.)

Gandhi. What is this? Such big weapons are seen with police.

Raju. Bapu. Now a days they are calling army for assistance every time

Gandhiji. Are they going to war? With whom? Our own people are there as agitators. We are not even agitating

Narsimha. That is the joke of the day

( Police Inspector announces in mike that Gandhi and his followers must stop and disperse or else they will take strong action)

Gandhi. Look. We have come in peace. We want to discuss why people are being troubled. There is no petrol for last three days. Prices have sky rocketed. We want CM to come out and talk to us.

Inspector. Hey old man, who are you. Look like a buffoon in the dress of Gandhi. Is CM so cheap that he would come out speak to beggars like you.

Gandhi. I am real Gandhi. Not a fake one. Neither a beggar.

Inspector. Haa…haa. You can not fool us. Gandhi was shot dead 60 years ago by Nathuram Godse. My father told me

Gandhi. That is fine. But I have come back. Great men do not die

Inspector. You may be anything. How much money has been paid to you to get dressed like this?

Gandhi. Keep quiet. Behave Inspector. Even English police Inspectors were well behaved. Your father was also not born when I was facing the English police men. You… you.. behave…. Do not think that Gandhi is like today’s politician who can be sold . Gandhi becomes very angry and sways violently with anger.

I am the Gandhi above all this shit
I also know all this a big bullshit
You may use rifle and I may be hit
Know that it would affect me least bit

( Gandhi and his followers go further close and without warning the police open fire with rifle. First rifle does not fire and second rifle is also dead. A bullet from third rifle comes sizzling towards Gandhi with slow speed and he catches it with hand. Gandhi asks all his followers to stand behind him in a line. The police men fire again and Gandhi laughs and catches the bullets and shows them)

Gandhi. Look inspector. Your bullets are of no use. You know I am already dead. Nothing can happen to me.

Inspector. Then I shall take care of the guys behind you. I shall see how they escape?

( Gandhi turns back and casts a spell like Mandrake the magician. In a gesture he shows his palm with vigour. Every one appears like Gandhi )

(All Gandhi are now seen holding sticks and do jig laughing at the helpless police men)
Gandhi again looks at the police men and casts a spell. The police men feel that wild animals like Tigers and lions and panthers and a T rex are falling on them. They scream wildly and run away from there leaving weapons too..)

Gandhi. Heee.. heee. Hee. You a bunch of nuts.. you were challenging father of nation..

Gandhi and his followers go ahead and reach the gates of assembly hall. In the gate they find a statue of Gandhi in sitting and meditating position. In front of the statue many leaders are seen standing and taking photographs. In fact they were also protesting against the government that did not permit them from chwing pan in the aseembly premises. As a protest they were chewing pan and were spitting around the statue. The whole area became filth. Gandhi sees them and hold head

Gandhi. Ohf. What type of guys these are. In the mean time a leader Dasanna comes to Gandhi and asks who he was

Das. Hoi. Old man. You really look like Gandhi. How about a fag yar. He takes out a Wills cigarette and asks for a match box from Gandhi.

Gandhi. Bhai. I do not smoke and also I do not eat pan

Das. Gutka khaate ho ( Do you eat Gutka)

Gandhi. What is that?

Das. It is some type of tobacco product

Gandhi.. Chee.. cheee.. No never

Das, Then how you can be a leader? You do not eat pan, neither eat Gutka nor drink rum. What sort of guy you are?

Gandhi. Bhai is it a must do all these?

Das. Look friend. Unless you do all these things, no use in this country. More over you must be arrested at least once for anti social activities, like land grabbing, molesting some woman, Chain snatching, Vehicle lifting, holding illegal arms, Illicit liquor brewing. Bigamy, Kidnapping, Lifting of vehicles, bank frauds, Chit fund frauds, attempted robbery, attempted murder, any fraud and counterfeit note printing and any thing that is anti social. Nothing happens to you. In jail you will be treated with all respects and facilities. Every one knows soon you will be great leader.

Gandhi. Ohf. .. What a state of affairs in India?

Das. More you get arrested more clout you will have. Parties shall grab you offer tickets to you. Jails are gateways to success and power

Gandhi. Bahia. I am not interested in elections now.

Das. Then why this dress you are putting on? Even if Gandhi stands for elections, no one will vote for him. Congress party also shall not give ticket to him.

Gandhi. Let them be happy.

All the guys are big fraud
Like asses head they nod
It is better one is in grave
Than posing to be very brave

Das. Bye the bye to which party you are seeking ticket. Or contesting as independent?

Gandhi. I have no party.

Das. You look like a mad guy. Better start Gandhi party. You will be alone in that party….heee..heee.. The pseudo Gandhis also will not join your party.

Narsimha.. Bapu. Let us go from here. We cannot meet CM now. He just left in chopper. He has ditched us.

Gandhi. That is good. That is not new.

( In the mean time police Inspector and some constables run towards them and shouting)

Inspector. Catch the guys. This Gandhi is here. Catch him.. Beat him.. If you can not catch him shoot him….Make an example out of him. They are here.. You… bloody..


(Police men come close. Gandhi looks at them and gestures like Mandrake the magician with the twist of his hand. The police men fall one over another and Inspector beneath all of them. He shouts ..)

Inspector. Margaya.. bachao ( save )

Gandhi ( Laughs) heee… heee.. That is enough for the day. Are these guys to protect India? Bunch of fun characters. Nut cases really.

( Gandhi, Narsimha and many others like Kareem, Rahmat, Krishna, Rama, Ramesh, yadgiri, Sudhir, Nayak, , Jagadeesh, Vikram walk away singing and waving hands along with others on the main road... some are whistling and booing too)

Dr K Prabhakar Rao

Dr K Prabhakar Rao

No comments: